DROYLSDEN 4 - 1 AFC HALIFAX. Match report by Johnny Meynell

For those of you easily offended, do not read the following match report as it contains elements of truth and hilarity.

Taking time off from their crucial IFA League matches, AFC Halifax travelled to the exotic complex at Curzon Ashton for a friendly with Droylsden Supporters. The game was played on the lush bays of Astroturf, lovingly tendered by a certain Mark Bradshaw, who runs the complex. Not only was it a pleasure to catch up with a Halifax Town Conference legend (and in the case of one AFC member, a former team mate) but also to have the game refereed impeccably by him as well.
Manager John Barker took a squad of fourteen players, though no lack of quality, over the Pennines, and with last week's difficult, yet memorable victory over those lovely Ilkeston lads fresh in the minds, the players were asked to get at Droylsden in the manner they had done so recently against Huddersfield Town and the ill-fated Burnley match (AFC were leading 2-0 before the game was abandoned).
But that was to underestimate Droylsden, whose line-up of youth and experience was taken to the extreme, with a twelve-year-old coming on in the second half when victory for Droylsden was all but assured, whilst their oldest member was 42, still a youngster when compared to some of the stars turning out for AFC. Droylsden took total charge during the first twenty minutes with some neat inter passing and running off the ball, and had the AFC lot in something of a tizzy. They'd already fashioned the first goal after just four minutes, but it was one which was very preventable. A long ball over the top towards the left flank had Matty Lumb unexpectedly pressed into urgent action, but he was up against a real nipster. Yet to his credit, Lumby chased him into the penalty area and appeared to have smothered the danger. Then, in a split second, the Droylsden player stole the ball and in an instant fired the ball hard and low past a startled Dave Foy into the far corner.
AFC realised they were in a tough game, and one that was of contrasting styles. Whilst Droylsden played a push-and-run style (very much in the mould of Arthur Rowe's 1952 Tottenham side) AFC were more direct, which, perhaps, was their undoing, as they were apt to present the ball back to their opponents all too frequently. Though that's not to say that chances weren't created. Martin Bishop found himself in the clear with only the keeper to beat. You could almost hear the late great Radio Two commentator Peter Jones says 'And Bish must score,' but when the time came to pull the trigger, all Bish fired were blanks and the keeper saved easily.
But despite being on the rack for most of the half, it was from a Droylsden attack that AFC equalised after twenty minutes. Johnny Meynell's tackle just inside his own penalty area evoked memories of Moore against Jairzinho in 1970, and his clearance found big Stewart Heaton. Big Stu saw the opening and released Andrew Hemblys, who homed in on goal. There was still some work for Hembers to do, but when he reached the eighteen yard line he fired into the top left hand corner for a sublime finish (at this point, it must be pointed out that Hembers very much needed to redeem himself after two unsavoury incidents in which he was the sole culprit in the Shay car park prior to setting off. Firstly, he slammed the ball inadvertently into Miss C's car not once but twice, so incurring her wrath that the no-nonsense teacher hurled the ball down the Shay Syke banking. Then, at the very spot where Miss C dispatched the ball, Hembers scented it in the manner of a tom cat, in the full view of Mrs Shaymus and her niece. Disgraceful behaviour. So Hembers needed to pull out something special, although he might argue he already had).
But I digress. Back to the game, and AFC were again on level terms, but for how long? Sadly, not even ten minutes. Another Droylsden raid led to a corner being conceded on the right, and when it came over it was met by their Number Five, climbing above Big Stew, and headed powerfully goal wards, leaving Dave Foy grasping thin air. It was the textbook header.
A 2-1 deficit, one felt, could be overturned in the second half; a 3-1 deficit, well, it was always going to be harder. But that's what AFC did indeed face as the half-time whistle blew. Yet it seemed a more avoidable goal than Droylsden's first. A long cross field pass from the left split the AFC defence but as the Foymeister came out to deal with it he looked in control and favourite to sweep up. But the Droylsden player man who'd chased the ball took advantage of a momentary lapse and made to go round the keeper and perhaps put the ball into an empty net. He never got the chance. Foyster, using all the experience and skill picked up from endless Bruce Lee videos (some even on DVD now) gave the Droylsden player a severe push in the back and the penalty was perhaps the easiest decision the ref had to make all the game. It was neatly dispatched and AFC had two goals to claw back. One can only wonder just how interesting things would have been had Hembers' instant shot from Kev Dawson's intelligent pull-back drifted inches under the bar instead of over seconds from the break. But there we were half-time and 3-1 to Droylsden.
The team talk by John Barker and Dave Thompson intimated that the game was not dead, but AFC needed the next goal. And with Droylsden making several changes, including goalkeeper (they swapped Hardy for Laurel) and a twelve-year-old making an appearance down the right flank, perhaps AFC stood a chance. True, they gave it their all for the first fifteen minutes, but it didn't take them anywhere. Suddenly, Droylsden raided once more, swift running off the ball, and AFC were split again. The young Droylsden player forward drew sub keeper Chris Wigglesworth, rounded him and scored into an empty net. AFC were 4-1 down and the game looked over.
It would be true to say that AFC were, for the most part, on the back foot as Droylsden, certainly towards the end, played a fair amount of keep ball, but they did have chances. Scott Varley came closest with a free-kick that was tipped over by the keeper, and the same player headed just over the bar from a corner, as did Barker. Ashley Addy had a snap shot which rose just over the bar, and there were several scraps from corners where the ball just wouldn't fall kindly enough. At the other end, the most clear-cut chance fell to the youngest player on the field, but when he found himself one-on one, he did a Bish and Wiggy made the save. Wiggy had earlier pulled off another save from an almost identical situation, so at least he was on his game.
As the game entered into its closing stages AFC were chasing the ball and nothing was going right. They even had to contend with a blizzard which bit into their faces. No it wasn't easy and frustration inevitably crept in. Matt Blackburn, pushed up front as AFC went 4-3-3 in the last fifteen, ended up grappling with their centre back and tempers frayed slightly.
Sometimes you have to admit you've been beaten by a better side. On the day, Droylsden were just that, but an invitation to sample the delights of Savile Park Moor is always on the table for them. But when the likes of Terry Sunderland, suddenly so composed and assured, steps inside his man and then has an aberration and freezes in time before falling over (this incident really did happen) then you know it's not going to be your day.
Team; Foy, Lumb, Barker, Thompson, Sunderland; Varley, Bishop, Meynell, Dawson; Heaton, Hemblys. Subs; Addy, Blackburn, Wigglesworth.